NBA 2010 Wrap-Up

Well, the season is over. Good playoffs, great final game, congrats to the Lakers. Now that that's out the way, I'd like to make a few notes on some observations I made throughout the playoffs that leave some questions for next season (considering there isn't a lockout).

• LeBron James - I've already talked about his free agency, but I think his losing in the second round raises a different question: is he really the key to a title? Has LeBron proven that he will be able to lead a team to a championship? He's super talented, there's no denying that. But I'm not yet convinced that he's going to guarantee his next team a trip to the Finals. People always compare him to Magic Johnson, but as of right now, he's a lot more like Dominique Wilkins.

• Boston Celtics - What happens now? Kevin Garnett isn't great anymore, Ray Allen is a free agent, Sheed might retire, and Doc Rivers might not come back as coach. On top of all that, Tom Thibodeau, the assistant coach that runs their daunted defense, is leaving to be the Bulls' head coach. This whole team could potentially blow up and be a bottom-feeder. What a shame. (Who am I kidding? That would be great. I hate this team.)

• Dirk Nowitzki - He has a player option on next season and has stated that he'll be testing free agency. There have even been rumors of him maybe signing with the Suns to reunite with his BFF Steve Nash... I do think he should leave Dallas (they're not getting any closer than 2006* again, let's face it), but I don't think Phoenix is the best option. An all-offense player on an all-offense team? And how can he and Frye coexist? I think he fits in better with Chicago, but I guess we'll see if he even leaves at all.

The Summer of LeBron

You see that picture? Pretty good, right? He looks nice in that orange and blue, don't you agree?

I think so. Of course, that clearly has everything to do with my being a Knicks fan, and us not having a star in God knows how long (although David Lee made the All-Star Game this year, shout-out to him). Considering his free agent status is t-minus 42 days, nothing would be better for us than seeing LBJ play in MSG.

Of course, we all knew this was coming. LeBron's impending free agency has been anticipated for the past 2 or 3 seasons, and the Knicks (along with a few other teams) have been preparing for it. Hiring Donnie Walsh as our General Manager was a great first step, as he's been able to give us the salary cap space that the last two losers spent so much time trying to throw away. But even after we had the money, I still had one concern: the Cleveland Cavaliers. I knew that if LeBron won a championship with the Cavs, the likelihood of him leaving would probably diminish. After all, what superstar leaves a team after they win a title?

As we all know now, that didn't happen. Despite winning 61 games this season, the Cavs blew it in the second round, losing to the Celtics in a Game 6 in which they didn't even seem to be trying at times. Personally, I was ecstatic. I was rooting for them to lose for my own selfish reasons, and it was probably the first time I rooted for Boston since 2002. When it was all over, Knicks fans everywhere rejoiced. Our chance had come! For a team that hasn't been to the Finals in 11 years, the Cavs' loss was our biggest win in years.

But what now? Free agency doesn't start until July 1, yet it still hasn't stopped everyone from speculating where LeBron might go and what his reason for going will be. I've heard he was staying in Cleveland because he's a loyal native of Ohio. I've heard he was leaving the Cavaliers because Delonte West slept with his mother. I've heard he would only sign with a team if they hired John Calipari as a coach. I've heard he was going to Chicago to play with Derrick Rose and Joakim Noah. I've heard it all. And then, of course, there's Worldwide Wes.

Truth is, none of us really know where LeBron will end up. He's getting the max contract either way, so you know there are only a number of teams that are capable of getting him (including the Cavs, who can actually offer him the most money due to the Larry Bird Exception). Do I hope he goes to New York? Of course. Will I cry if he doesn't? Of course. But I won't pretend that I know he'll definitely be a Knick, because I don't. Realistically? I think it's between us, the Cavs, and the Bulls. Because Miami is Wade's town, and who really wants to play for the Clippers, Nets, Wizards or Kings?

In the end, though, all I can do is hope. Because no one really knows. So if you hear any more news about where LeBron will go this summer, just ignore it. Chances are, they're just making up some news to keep themselves entertained since this year's playoffs have been so boring. Oh well.

Successful Black Women... You Mad??

Last night, I was lurking around on Twitter when I started to notice a few people commenting on ABC Nightline's latest special entitled, "Why Can't a Successful Black Woman Find a Man?" Provocative title, but it's nothing we as black people haven't already discussed ad nauseum. I was watching the NBA Playoffs, so I didn't bother to switch channels, but after I saw some outstanding responses from a number of people on twitter, I decided to see what all the fuss was about. So I logged onto Nightline's website to check the special out for myself.

Personally, I found the special to be well done, and felt that there were a lot of things discussed that weren't a part of the usual discussion on this topic. For one, I especially liked the point Hill Harper made about black men and women failing to be each other's friends. He argued that much of the disconnect between genders come from a lack of communication. When women get man advice from other women and men get woman advice from other men, everybody ends up being misinformed.

I also enjoyed Steve Harvey's point that many successful black women refuse to date men that aren't on the same social level that they're on, but they fail to realize that they are often the key piece that a man needs to get to that level. Harper repeatedly talked about dating a man for his potential as opposed to dating a man for what he currently has, and I'm not sure if the women on the panel ever really grasped what he meant at the end of the night.

Above all, I believe that the best point raised came at the end of the night from a woman in the audience.

Playboy, Passes, & A Racist Penis

I'm sure this topic has been beaten to death in the blogosphere over the past week, and I may be late in discussing it (especially in this instant message-twitter-google buzz world we live in), but eff it. I feel like talking about it anyway, not only because I like to look at my own words (which I do), but also because I don't think it's been discussed from my particular point-of-view.

After John Mayer's Playboy interview leaked (click here to read it), there were two things that I saw everyone up in arms about: his racist penis and his ownership of a "nigger pass." Now, as a black man who's not only super-proud of his heritage but also someone who has made a number of public statements about my love for black women, I guess I was supposed to be annoyed and bothered by Mayer's statements. I should call him a racist, ban his alleged "hood pass" and tell everyone to boycott his music. But guess what? I'm not doing any of that stuff. And to be honest, I wasn't even offended by what he said.

If you're surprised/shocked/appalled by my lack of concern, I would implore you to go and read the interview for yourself. I say that, of course, because I'm willing to bet that most of the people who were upset by Mayer's statements didn't even read the context from which the statements came. As a product of a journalism education, I'm well aware that a quote without the proper context can sound completely different than how it was meant to sound. But when you read the article, you'll see that neither of his "offensive" quotes were actually meant in a racist way. I'm convinced that the same people who were quick to get offended either didn't read the article or misunderstood the context from which the quotes came. Let's explore...

What Women Want

"Girrrrrl, lemme tell you... It's like everything was going so well, you know? But then, it seems like the more I get to know him, he just... ugh, I don't know. It's like he just doesn't get it! Why doesn't he get it?? Why doesn't he UNDERSTAND me??"

Famous conversation piece amongst women, no? In fact, how many women reading this haven't been in this very discussion? It seems that girls often talk about how little we men know about their desires and needs in the context of a relationship. And quite frankly, that's because we don't. But although I will be the first to admit that women are damn near impossible to figure out (much less to please), I do think there are a number of very basic needs that every woman looks for in men that they are attracted to. Simple desires that even we should be able to figure out. So, for the benefit of any man who may read this blog, I have listed what I believe to be the five most basic things that the average woman will require from a significant other...

1. Good conversation
Let's be honest here: Women love to talk. This is no surprise. And depending on the individual, she may want nothing more than for your ass to just listen to her and pretend to be interested. But of course, if the woman is any more than an incessant chatterbox, she's gonna want you to do some talking as well. Anyone can text, but can you put in work on the phone? Too many of us guys just don't know how to keep good, intriguing conversation, and I'm willing to bet that that's a major turn-off for a lot of women. Try to show her that you have some sort of intellect, because keeping a woman intrigued is way more important than getting her to think you're cute.

2. Keep her smiling/laughing
Although I've never heard a man say this, women almost ALWAYS say they want a man that can make them laugh. This actually plays into the first point; if you can't keep good conversation and you're boring, why would any woman want to talk to you? Ever?? I think the underlying issue, more than a woman wanting a funnyman, is that girls want to see that you have some sort of a personality. Often times, one's personality can be determined by their sense of humor. Now, don't get it twisted... this doesn't mean you should actively be making a litany of jokes in an attempt to cajole a chuckle out of her. Don't try too hard. Just be yourself, and more times than not, she'll end up smiling.

3. Good sex
Does it sound shallow? Absolutely. But is it true? Most definitely. And if you don't think a girl will stop talking to a guy because the sex sucks, I would suggest that you ask some of your female friends. I've heard some stories; you'd be surprised. Now, I'm a firm believer that no one can be inherently bad in bed. But I do understand that different people want and expect different things sexually, and it's our job as men to adjust to what our partner wants. However, ladies, a large bit of the responsibility falls on your shoulders, as well. If you don't tell us the sex is bad or suggest ways to improve, we'll be none the wiser, and the sex will continue to suck. So don't talk behind his back about him being lame. If you like him enough and you want things to get better, do like Drake and say something.

4. Ambition
Now, I'm only 23, and most of the people I know that read this blog are also under 30. At our age (and especially in this economy), no woman is really expecting you to be paying your own mortgage with a Mercedes Benz and a 4-car garage. Hell, a full-time job isn't even a guarantee nowadays. But one thing that the recession has not changed is women's desire to find a man with some sort of ambition and drive. Regardless of where you are in life, women want to know that you have issues that you're passionate about and that you are making progressive strides to better yourself. If you are going nowhere in life and seem content remaining blase, that most certainly will not help your cause.

5. Make her feel special
I saved this one for last because it's really the most important one. Above all else, all a woman really wants is for a man to make her feel special. That's it. Everything else on this list comes secondary. So put her on a pedestal. Treat her like a queen. Do a bunch of mushy sh*t. Making a woman feel special will give you so many brownie points that you can afford to mess up on a few thing here and there and still keep her, because she knows how good you make her feel (no Monster's Ball). Keep this in mind, and you really can't lose.

Of course, in order to insure the accuracy of this list, I had to think on the other side of things. If these are the things girls want, what are the main things women complain about? In my opinion, I would say women most complain that men: a) aren't faithful, b) are too boring, or c) are too selfish/self-centered. If this is true, I think my list stands up pretty well. Being unfaithful goes against #5, because cheating is the biggest way NOT to show a woman she's special to you, since you're basically telling her you need something better. Being too boring goes against #1 and #2, and she'll quickly become disinterested in you. (Being too boring might even go against #3 too, but that's a whole 'nother blog post.) And being self-centered goes against #1 and #5, because as much as women like to talk, no girl likes to hear a guy talk incessantly about himself. And of course, a selfish man won't make a girl feel special.

In short, just follow these rules, and you can't go wrong. Have I ever steered you wrong before?