YouTube. The greatest way to waste time since 2005. I can't tell you how many times I've gone to YouTube to watch a video and found myself repeatedly clicking on those related videos on the right toolbar. Next thing I know, I've been watching videos for the past hour, and I can't even remember what brought me to YouTube in the first place. I remember during my sophomore year of college when YouTube had just begun to get popular, my college roommate and I would spend countless hours on YouTube just wasting time. Before I knew it, it would be 2:43 in the morning and I'd realize that I still wasn't done with that essay that was due in 6 hours. However, I wouldn't want you to suffer from the same procrastination penalties that haunted me. So, listed below are my favorite YouTube videos, the ones that I've enjoyed sharing with my friends time and time again. I'm sure there are some that I've forgotten, but such is life. Without further ado...
Teacher Explains the word "nigga"
"Can you hand a nigga a pencil?" A few things about this one. First, I love how they got a black newswoman to cover the story. Second, I love how they tried to portray the kid as a good-natured honor student. I'm almost positive he said the word first, and I'd also guarantee that he's one of the most disruptive kids in the class. He's just a bad-ass kid that wants his teacher to get fired. Third, Mr. Dawson's use of flashcards is absolutely epic. Fourth, the part of the video from 2:28 to 2:43 might be the funniest 15 seconds ever recorded. This video is so awesome, they even spoofed it on The Boondocks.
This video actually inspired my user name as a blogger. This uses a little bit of internet nerd humor, but the fact that someone took the time to make fun of posting first in comment sections is absolutely hilarious to me.
Cuba Gooding Sr. does a Carl Lewis with the Nat'l Anthem
You could easily spend over an hour just watching funny National Anthem videos alone, so I decided to include only my favorite one. This is classic not only because he sings with so much confidence, but also because he's all over the place, he changes the pace mid-song, he switches octaves about 19 times, and he sings the words wrong ("O'er the rampant we watch, through the twilight's last gleaming"). I also love how he begins by simply stating, "Test."
Booker T Calls Hulk Hogan a Nigga
One of the best wrestling accidents of all time. The thing that makes it so funny is not only the fact that he said this on live television about a white person to a white person, but also the fact that you can see the instant regret on his face as soon as he says it. He even hits a double facepalm.
The Most Professional Use Of "Pause"
Gus Johnson is the man. After the Knicks made a trade, he asks long-time Knicks fan Spike Lee what he thinks about it. While listing the new players acquired in the trade, he means to say "I like (Dan) Dickau." Instead, he accidentally says, "I like Dick." For whatever reason, despite the fact that he's conducting an interview, Gus feels the need to say "pause", complete with a very distinguished hand motion. Professional indeed.
Cam'ron on O'Reilly
Another classic. You knew it was on when Cam showed up to The O'Reilly Factor wearing a throwback jersey and a matching fitted. The ignorance was sky-high, because both Cam and Bill O were completely one-sided and unwilling to understand the other's point of view. Best moment: "I got dirt on you, doggie. I'ma get at you in a minute." Also, check out when Stephen Colbert was on O'Reilly Factor. Hilarity ensues.
E-N-J vs. NIKS
Thanks to the internet, this has to be the most popular rap battle between two guys that nobody's ever heard of. And as it turns out, this was "not ya typical rap battle." Sure, nobody likes when someone points in their face. But what I found even more offensive were his terrible bars, which included lines like "I advise you don't really wanna beef with me" and "you could have better gear, couldn't style it on me". Also, peep how his hat goes flying.
The whistles go... whoo whoo!
Of course this would happen in Oakland. I can't decide which part about this video I enjoy the most: the heavy Bay Area accents, the fact that they got the whitest guy in the newsroom to report the story, or the fact that this man actually told the news station that his name was "Bubb Rubb".
"I got this trick for you! Are you a freak? Are you a prostitute??" Is it possible that this homeless man from Houston's 3rd Ward is a better rapper than both E-N-J and NIKS? It's debatable. I think what makes this video so enjoyable is not only the fact that he takes the time out to inform us of where he kicks it with his ho, but also the fact that he beatboxes his own chorus, spits a verse, then goes back to the hook. Regardless, I'd argue that he's better than half the industry when he deliver bars like, "Guess what, bitch? Ya get a SSI check!"
Honorable Mention: The Rent Too Damn High, Press Hop 2, Leprechaun in Mobile AL, Double Rainbow, any Nardwuar interview
2 hours ago